Sometimes I take an emotional dip around Christmas time. This is not uncommon for many people perhaps because our expectations are too high and the food too rich.
I have made a list of how I have, over the years, managed to dig myself into a hole around the holiday season.
You might as well make your family and friends miserable too. No point in putting up with their cheery attitude.
Study this list. There is something here for everyone.
Follow these Christmas blah tips before and after the season
* Go off your regular sleeping schedule. Get more sleep or get less sleep. Either way you won’t feel the same.
* Over eat. It is rude not to do so.
* Staying home during the season is an interesting option. This way you can spend time thinking about why you don’t feel as good as you would like. Allow your reflections to turn into self-indulgence. This is the key.
* Running from one social event to the next is the norm. That way you won’t disappoint anyone because you will meet every obligation. You’ve only got one life. Use it up!
* Exercising less. This is the time to kick back. So what if your body produces natural anti-depressants when you exercise. You can get a high on something else.
* Keep your gaze downward when you are walking. That way you can lock in those special feelings and you might even find a quarter.
* Expect your partner to read your mind. He or she should know that you are at the end of your rope while you hurl the pots and soufflés around the kitchen with steam coming out of your ears. If you do this right, you can stay angry for days!
* Moping around is normal. This is life. Get used to it.
* Stay in your housecoat for several days if you can. Do not answer the phone even though you may wonder where your friends are and why nobody talks to you anymore.
* Each morning make a mental list of everything that is not quite right in your entire life. If you feel a smile creeping on, review your list. Seriously.
* Ignore the person sitting at the breakfast table with you. Read the newspaper instead. After all, you will most likely be able to catch up with him/her later and the news is, well, the news. Better yet, do some texting so you can connect with your friends.
* Blaming is a fruitful practice. One can always fine-tune this skill over the holiday. There are plenty of opportunities, especially on the home front. If you feel crappy, maybe it is someone else’s fault. I especially like blaming my partner for me being tired.
* Hang overs are recommended. That way you can remind every cell in your body that your life really does suck.
* Do not, I repeat do not, look at the sky or the trees. And never sit in a sunbeam. This will just make you want to cry.
Reads well, funny, insightful. The formatting is clear and makes it easy to read. Keep it up.
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